The strangest things vet techs have heard clients say

“My dog doesn’t have fleas, we live in a very expensive neighborhood.”

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It’s time for another round of “weird stuff clients say!” vet tech edition, this one with a little more snark than usual. Courtesy r/VetTech on Reddit.

“I don’t believe in vaccinations.”

From Reddit user Kharmaticlism:

“I’m a breeder of wolf-hybrids. I don’t believe in vaccinations. I soak with my dog every other day so I know she doesn’t have fleas. We bred her last month, but I know it didn’t take.” (Dog is super skinny, missing hair everywhere, covered in fleas, belly super red and yeasty from irritation, inflammation.)

Yes. Yes they do.

From Reddit user DaughterofArathorn:

“Dogs have temperatures?”

Fleas don’t discriminate.

From Reddit user danyelledatme:

“My dog doesn’t have fleas, we live in a very expensive neighborhood.”

Her fleas couldn’t tell the difference, I suppose.


From Reddit user NameUnbroken:

“My dog has been having a constant seizure for, like, 4 hours. The internet said to put olive oil in his mouth, so we did and we waited for them to stop, but they never did.”

Why pay for anything?

From Reddit user wheet_woo:

“Why do I need to pay for an exam? My dog doesn’t need an exam to get spayed.”


From Reddit user Spare3Parts:

“I want her spayed. What do you mean she can’t have babies after she is spayed, how is she going to make me money?!”

If you say so…

From Reddit user SquirrelsforScience:

“He’s from South America so all of his internal organs are different. He can’t eat that dog food, it has to be small pieces and natural.”


From Reddit user FractiousPhoebe:

“Of course my dog is aggressive. You were aggressive by putting a muzzle on it.”

Thanks, Cesar Millan.*

From Reddit user 000ttafvgvah:

“Fear aggressive? I think you meant to say he’s dominant. You just need to poke/kick him and make a sssh noise.”

* Credit to reddituser Crashman2004 for that perfect response.

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